Can Someone around Here Translate Google’s Nerd Language for Me Please?

I have a business partner that suggested we implement Google Apps into our company so as to enhance and make more effective our collaboration efforts. Upon hearing his request, I said that would be fine, but to please send me a link explaining the benefits of Google Apps. Here is the link he sent, and upon viewing, I could only shake my head and wonder if I was the idiot, or if Google was just speaking way above my non-techie head.

As I’ve mentioned time and time again, every person and business in one way or another suffers to some extent from the ‘Curse of Knowledge’. Basically, we all have a really bad tendency to assume that everyone else knows what the heck we’re talking about, which is rarely the case.

Take for example this page on the Google Apps explanation. When one takes a closer view at it, the copy’s language is practically indecipherable to about 99% of the world. Let’s break this down:

Under Business Features, Google says:

25GB email storage per user,
BlackBerry and Microsoft Outlook
interoperability and more

News Flash for Google:

• Most people don’t even know what a GB is or its value. Therefore, 25 GB means nothing to them.
• ‘Interoperability’….Say what? OK, so maybe I get that…kinda…but don’t ya think you could have described that in a little more elementary manner?

Under Business Controls, Google says:

SSO, forced SSL, custom password
strength requirements and more

This is where I really started laughing. Talk about a ‘Say what??’ moment:

• 99% of the world has no idea what SSO means.
• 99% of the world doesn’t know what SSL means, much less ‘forced’ SSL.
• Strength Requirements? You mean to tell me there is such a thing?

Finally, under Business Support and Reliability:

99.9% uptime guarantee SLA and
24/7 support

• Again, most people, despite how simple it may sound, don’t understand the phrase ‘uptime guarantee’.
• As for SLA…. What the heck is that?

What’s my point here?

My point is we all need to be careful not to assume our customers know anything. This certainly applies to features and always applies to acronyms. Google has assumed that the majority of the people reading that junk understand what the heck it’s saying. Truth be told, they don’t, which is why such ad copy ain’t going to work, at least not for the ‘non-techies’ of the world. (You know, the other 99%?)

So take the time today to review the language you use with clients. What words and phrases are you using that are causing blank looks and confused faces? This especially applies to your company website. Are you writing at advanced levels in order to impress or are you writing so that everyone will understand? If you don’t know, grab your spouse, friend, or a relative and have them look at your website with you and point out every area of confusion. I can assure you that such an activity will be incredibly eye-opening.

Thoughts? Opinions? As always, your comments are appreciated.

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